Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
