Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
