it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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