omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
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