i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Randomize
