It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I know her cup size but not her name....
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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