I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
