you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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