no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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