So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
