No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
