somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
