I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
