i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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