I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Randomize
