So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Randomize
