We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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