And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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