i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
