I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
