How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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