Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
