yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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