Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
