Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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