I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize