i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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