We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
