Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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