you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
It's never too late to be topless.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I got inside last night via doggy door
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
