i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
