wake up i wanna do it froggy style
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Randomize