I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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