You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
