Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
