So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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