My nipple is on Facebook.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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