Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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