I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
