I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Go christen that room with your naked body.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
