Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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