NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
