Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize