I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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