The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
