Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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