i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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