What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
operation harelip BJ is a go
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
