I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
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