You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
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