I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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